Christa

Illustrations by Marcus, Grumblebee.com
I hung out with Jeremy a-lot that summer. He was one of the only kids in my neighborhood who had also adopted a freak look. He could be counted on if I ran out of aqua net, and we'd go clothes shopping together.

Christa lived around the corner from Jeremy. Her family was real redneck and Christa was pretty out of date fashion wise. She had a great body and she was pretty, but in addition to her fashion deficiency she had a mild cross eye.

"Chicks like that are awesome." Jeremy professed. "She's hot, but she has no self esteem. She'll let us do whatever we want."

Jeremy and I had spent too much time looking at porn and jerking off. The idea of a girl who would let us do whatever we wanted was too much to resist. After several days of fantasizing about Christa Jeremy invited her over. She was there ten minutes after he'd rang her phone.

Someone had done something to Christa. I could sense that she was broken. She hit the big bottles of booze in Jeremy's kitchen immediately and though she was only 13 years old she swallowed tequila like it was water. She popped a few of Jeremy's mom's pills as well. She claimed to know what they were. Jeremy and her were in the back room for awhile.

I sat in the living room wondering how I'd sank so low. Just a few weeks earlier I'd been dancing with Leslie Ferra who wore tight knee length skirts and eye shadow on her lips. Now I was waiting for my turn to victimize a sad wasted girl. Jeremy came out hopping with joy. "I fucked her dude." he whooped. "Your turn."

I went in to the room feeling feverish and dizzy. She was lovely. For some reason I was pretty sure she was acting more wasted than she actually was. I pet her and asked her if she liked Jeremy. I slid my finger into her and for some reason told her to tell me when I was in as far as Jeremy had been in her. I stopped myself. I missed being Catholic. We born agains didn't have anonymous confession and I wanted to get to a priest who wasn't also a close family friend in a hurry. "Jeremy I gotta go."

I ran out the door and I was sure that the sin showed on my face. Halfway up the street I ran into my mom who was out looking for me. "Where were you?" I was sure she had sensed what I'd been up to.

"I was at Jeremy's." I answered trying to sound normal.

"Are his parents home."

"No." I knew better than to lie. The last thing I needed was her walking to Jeremy's house and finding the mess there.

"What were you doing?"

"Nothing."

"I called his house. Why didn't you answer?"

"We were out back looking at his rabbits."

She bought it but she was still very upset. Maybe she did sense something. I headed home. I avoided Jeremy for awhile, attended church as much as possible and fought relentlessly with my little brother James. Mom finally couldn't take the fighting any more. Dad had gone to Sacramento ahead of the rest of us, while mom stayed behind to deal with selling the house and getting us moved. I was sent to stay with dad. My last summer in Corona cut short. I bitched and moaned, but it was a good thing. I hadn't had a "Fresh start" in a while and I really needed one now.

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